Why yes, yes, it did take me a full minute to correctly type that title! mwhahahaha! I have had a long week! I have had such a long work week. It's time to unwind! A bottle of Moscato to ease the muscles and unwind the mind. Just what the wino ordered!
I have dealt with morons all week! Most of them I work with! Can't ride because the back tire is bald. Oh how I need a nice ride.
Do you ever finally get an off day and you don't know what to do with yourself because there are too many options?? I want to read and write and watch movies... oh and wash clothes and clean house. Okay I really don't want to do those last two. LOL! Maybe Hero can provide some much needed distraction?
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Monday, June 27, 2011
It's been a long time...
Yes, it has been a long time. We had a financial snafu and Hero sold his bike. That's why he's Hero, in every since of the word. The MC that we've been hanging around with had a Patch Holder with a bike for sale and we are now the proud owners of a Honda Shadow Saber. Let me tell you the seat on there makes a world of difference to my backside.
I haven't been able to ride much because of work. So I've been a sad kitty. Also these Alabama summers are hell. That being said, why are biker accessories so dern expensive? I want to get new boots but Lord that's a 1/8 or more of my paycheck.
I want to ride more! Tell me, how do you all make time for riding when you have a full-time job and kids all on your plate?
I haven't been able to ride much because of work. So I've been a sad kitty. Also these Alabama summers are hell. That being said, why are biker accessories so dern expensive? I want to get new boots but Lord that's a 1/8 or more of my paycheck.
I want to ride more! Tell me, how do you all make time for riding when you have a full-time job and kids all on your plate?
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
The Post with no title
... Cause I'm exhausted, I can hardly even think. I didn't get anything done in the house. :( We did however get my name changed on my drivers license while I waited for Hero to reinstate his and take his motorcycle test. He passed and we both got our license. Then we went to the motorcycle shop and ordered his speedometer cable. It's kind scary not knowing how fast your barreling down the road. He just got a ticket the other day.
Later we went on a good ride. I practiced all my backseat etiquette, leaning properly on turns, gripping him and the back with my thighs on rough stops. It was a great ride. I had minimal discomfort with my butt and just a slight pain in my left leg. I've got to figure out how to "condition" my rearend. I can't be the whiny sissy biker wife. That just wont do. They need backseat biker wife for dummies.
Now I'm just hanging out with the Hero and Hay~belle watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer and pondering painting my nails. Let's hope for a good day at work tomorrow.
Have a good night everyone.... I'm exhausted!
Sweet Dreams,
Ash
Later we went on a good ride. I practiced all my backseat etiquette, leaning properly on turns, gripping him and the back with my thighs on rough stops. It was a great ride. I had minimal discomfort with my butt and just a slight pain in my left leg. I've got to figure out how to "condition" my rearend. I can't be the whiny sissy biker wife. That just wont do. They need backseat biker wife for dummies.
Now I'm just hanging out with the Hero and Hay~belle watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer and pondering painting my nails. Let's hope for a good day at work tomorrow.
Have a good night everyone.... I'm exhausted!
Sweet Dreams,
Ash
The History of Me: DISCLAIMER-This chronicle contains a mushy love story. I'm not responsible for any vomiting that may occur!
Background: Husband and I have been obsessively in love with each since 2004. I met him right before he deployed to Afghanistan, while I was in college. Talk about whirlwind romance. The crazy stunts, drama, and relationship building you can fit in just a few short months is amazing when you have a deployment looming over your head. I was just out of a really bad relationship, with four kids in tow, not looking to get into anything. Well here comes a group of soldiers in their BDU's and I was hooked. I transformed into Patriotic Girl, a solider groupie extraordinaire . I still remain to this day devoted to the men and women that have served our country... la sigh...
Where was I? Oh smoking hot soldiers...
Well its a long story and best saved for another day. Long story short, from that moment we were inseparable. We went absolutely crazy, partied, got into trouble, total irresponsible morons. He came home on R&R some months later, was brutally attacked thus ending his military career. It put our relationship through hell. He had a hard time coming to terms with that loss. He pushed me away even as I tried to comfort him, but I don't take rejection well at all. So we tit-for-tatted until we both just through our hands up in the air. I was angry and devastated and married the first person I could find. I showed him... NOT.
Worse and most dangerous mistake I ever made. I married a predator. I spent 5 years fighting that jerks emotional and mental abuse, only to find out something far worse had been taking place. I have a hard time dealing with that... and its not something I can talk about. Let's just say even though I was never in love with him, I did care about him and we were better friends, so when I found out about his betrayal I was shocked, devastated, just broken. I felt like a fool. I had brought hurt and near destruction down upon my children and myself all because I was hurting and thought I needed someone. (Ladies out there, if this rings true with you, don't buy into that crap. Yes being loved is wonderful but you really need to get to know who you bring home... investigate and sometimes that's not even enough. Bottom line, abuse is not love. You don't feel loved do you? Didn't think so... you can feel that way without the torture and hurt. **steps off soap box** this has been your public service announcement for the day)
Over those 5 years that I was married to someone else, I'd get phone calls or instant messages from my soldier boy, who was now vet boy. He'd check in and see how the kids and I were doing. I'd pretend everything was okay and that he was annoying me some of the time. I couldn't help but feel the deep love I had for him, it just wouldn't die damnit, no matter how hard I tried to kill it. He came around once a couple years back and I knew then I couldn't let that happen again. The chemistry and bond we share is too strong for me to resist. So I said mean things and that I never wanted to see him again. I couldn't let my heart be known.
So one fine day in January of 2010, the bottom dropped out. I found out terrible things about jerk husband. He was a pervert, an evil, manipulating, lying pervert. I forced him out of my house and then fell into what can only be discribed as the blackest hole of self-hatred, hurt, and dispair. I was broken. That very same week vet boy morphed into my hero once again. He stayed with me and played our protector and helped us all begin to heal.
I saw so many changes in him, he had healed from his anger and self-destruction. He was still the same person just upgraded. I felt myself falling for him again, those feelings threatning to burst back through by vault I had sealed them in. I couldn't let that happen, just look at what I had come out of. Look at all the relationships before that. My heart just couldn't be trusted and so I didn't. I would flit in and out of a relationship with him and as soon as I felt like I was losing control, I'd fight him off and push him away. Do something awful, say something mean. I tried and tried to run him off, but he never left, he never gave up. He waited with patience and understanding. He built back up my trust in myself and others. Helped me believe in love again. I saw that he wouldn't abandon me and with that the flood gates opened and all those years of love that had been tucked away in my heart came rushing out.
He found us a place to live and shortly there after proposed to me. On February 13th we married and I've never felt so safe and loved. We still have to work through things, my past has thrown many obstacles in our way. Together we deal with them. He's my best friend, my hero, everything I have ever needed. Its a real fairy tale love story and this is just the beginning.
I don't know why I tell you all this. It might help make sense of future ramblings or I thought getting to know my history might give explanation to the insanity that sometimes flows from my brain. Whatever the reason, now you know and knowing is have the battle... I think. I promise we'll be back to your regularly scheduled biker wife ramblings asap.
Here's to YOUR Happily Ever After,
Ash
Where was I? Oh smoking hot soldiers...
Well its a long story and best saved for another day. Long story short, from that moment we were inseparable. We went absolutely crazy, partied, got into trouble, total irresponsible morons. He came home on R&R some months later, was brutally attacked thus ending his military career. It put our relationship through hell. He had a hard time coming to terms with that loss. He pushed me away even as I tried to comfort him, but I don't take rejection well at all. So we tit-for-tatted until we both just through our hands up in the air. I was angry and devastated and married the first person I could find. I showed him... NOT.
Worse and most dangerous mistake I ever made. I married a predator. I spent 5 years fighting that jerks emotional and mental abuse, only to find out something far worse had been taking place. I have a hard time dealing with that... and its not something I can talk about. Let's just say even though I was never in love with him, I did care about him and we were better friends, so when I found out about his betrayal I was shocked, devastated, just broken. I felt like a fool. I had brought hurt and near destruction down upon my children and myself all because I was hurting and thought I needed someone. (Ladies out there, if this rings true with you, don't buy into that crap. Yes being loved is wonderful but you really need to get to know who you bring home... investigate and sometimes that's not even enough. Bottom line, abuse is not love. You don't feel loved do you? Didn't think so... you can feel that way without the torture and hurt. **steps off soap box** this has been your public service announcement for the day)
Over those 5 years that I was married to someone else, I'd get phone calls or instant messages from my soldier boy, who was now vet boy. He'd check in and see how the kids and I were doing. I'd pretend everything was okay and that he was annoying me some of the time. I couldn't help but feel the deep love I had for him, it just wouldn't die damnit, no matter how hard I tried to kill it. He came around once a couple years back and I knew then I couldn't let that happen again. The chemistry and bond we share is too strong for me to resist. So I said mean things and that I never wanted to see him again. I couldn't let my heart be known.
So one fine day in January of 2010, the bottom dropped out. I found out terrible things about jerk husband. He was a pervert, an evil, manipulating, lying pervert. I forced him out of my house and then fell into what can only be discribed as the blackest hole of self-hatred, hurt, and dispair. I was broken. That very same week vet boy morphed into my hero once again. He stayed with me and played our protector and helped us all begin to heal.
I saw so many changes in him, he had healed from his anger and self-destruction. He was still the same person just upgraded. I felt myself falling for him again, those feelings threatning to burst back through by vault I had sealed them in. I couldn't let that happen, just look at what I had come out of. Look at all the relationships before that. My heart just couldn't be trusted and so I didn't. I would flit in and out of a relationship with him and as soon as I felt like I was losing control, I'd fight him off and push him away. Do something awful, say something mean. I tried and tried to run him off, but he never left, he never gave up. He waited with patience and understanding. He built back up my trust in myself and others. Helped me believe in love again. I saw that he wouldn't abandon me and with that the flood gates opened and all those years of love that had been tucked away in my heart came rushing out.
He found us a place to live and shortly there after proposed to me. On February 13th we married and I've never felt so safe and loved. We still have to work through things, my past has thrown many obstacles in our way. Together we deal with them. He's my best friend, my hero, everything I have ever needed. Its a real fairy tale love story and this is just the beginning.
I don't know why I tell you all this. It might help make sense of future ramblings or I thought getting to know my history might give explanation to the insanity that sometimes flows from my brain. Whatever the reason, now you know and knowing is have the battle... I think. I promise we'll be back to your regularly scheduled biker wife ramblings asap.
Here's to YOUR Happily Ever After,
Ash
"Uh Baby... I bought a motorcycle"
Those words couldn't have chilled me to the core more. Terrifying for a lot of reasons. His safety was my first concern. My husband can be kind of unpredictable and spontaneous. Mix that with certain things and he can be kind of reckless too. Then I thought oh Lord, I'll never see him again, he's mobile now!!
My husband is a retired Veteran and pretty much stayed at home taking care of kids and feeding me. Now who's going to cook?? I know he was getting kind of grouchy stuck at home all the time but come on a freaking MOTORCYCLE?!? Those things get people killed! As in dead. I don't have life insurance on you yet buddy!
Then I thought about all the typical stereotypes that go along with bikers and being as my past relationships were pretty much sent from Hell... well lets say I am slightly insecure. I'm not one to brag, but my husband is pretty scrumptious I'd say. He still has his Army physique and gorgeous, melt-you-into-a-puddle, come hither blue eyes. Girls just flock to him. He can't help it really. So bikers are known for their beer guzzling and sexual indiscretions... right? I've always heard and seen on TV how they party their asses off and sleep with countless biker groupies... so it must be true. Right? They just hop on their bikes and disappear for days doing God-knows-what with God-knows-who. Can I get an amen?
So here I am with my phone gripped tightly in my hand having a panic attack, picturing it all now. The drunken stupors, the stds, the skanky sluts and me either running him over on his bike or filing for divorce before we even get to our first anniversary. I listened to him rattle off specs and figures excitedly while I planned for that home-wrecking hunk of metal's accidental demise. When he finally came to pick me up in our boring van we spoke of picking up the bike the next day. It was still winter and late at night... too cold to ride he mutters. Well our girls freak out as soon as they hear, arguing who was going to ride with Daddy first. The next thing I hear is, "Daddy, can't we go get it tonight?" I do a double take as I hear him reply, "Well, I guess so, if your mother doesn't mind". Its 3 against 1 ... out numbered again. How can I say no and be the bad guy?
So we drive the 70 miles to go pick it up and once I see it, I have to say that its a pretty bike. Saddle bags, sissy bar, back rest for him, pretty nice and a steal compared to what he paid for it. So I start to follow him home and its overwhelming the excitement and pure happiness you can feel emanating off of him. He looks awesome on it I have to admit. We stop three times so he can hop in the van to fight off the hypothermia and pluck the icicles off his mustache. Yep he's still grinning.
That was about a month and 1/2 ago. Since then I've ridden on the back and actually enjoyed myself. Its like a mini vacation away from everything. Its peaceful and exhilarating at the same time. I've had to get use to him not being where I left him and I did get a little jealous of his bike, the mistress. I am also coming to terms that our lives are changing whether it be for good or bad and that there's no sense in worrying. I think he's earned the trust. I mean he handled himself and came back whole from a hostile country so I guess he can handle himself on a bike. I know I have a long way to go but I'm coming around. All that biker lore I heard so much about does happen, but its not the norm. I'm just letting myself go with it, wherever the road takes us.
So stay tuned for my initiation into the role of biker wife and the mysterious world of bikers, MC's and developing an iron ass (those passenger seats are abusive to my delicate rear end) I'll share what I learn and hopefully learn something from those that dare to follow me into what is sure to be a comedy of errors!
May the wind always blow through your hair and your bike upright,
Ash
My husband is a retired Veteran and pretty much stayed at home taking care of kids and feeding me. Now who's going to cook?? I know he was getting kind of grouchy stuck at home all the time but come on a freaking MOTORCYCLE?!? Those things get people killed! As in dead. I don't have life insurance on you yet buddy!
Then I thought about all the typical stereotypes that go along with bikers and being as my past relationships were pretty much sent from Hell... well lets say I am slightly insecure. I'm not one to brag, but my husband is pretty scrumptious I'd say. He still has his Army physique and gorgeous, melt-you-into-a-puddle, come hither blue eyes. Girls just flock to him. He can't help it really. So bikers are known for their beer guzzling and sexual indiscretions... right? I've always heard and seen on TV how they party their asses off and sleep with countless biker groupies... so it must be true. Right? They just hop on their bikes and disappear for days doing God-knows-what with God-knows-who. Can I get an amen?
So here I am with my phone gripped tightly in my hand having a panic attack, picturing it all now. The drunken stupors, the stds, the skanky sluts and me either running him over on his bike or filing for divorce before we even get to our first anniversary. I listened to him rattle off specs and figures excitedly while I planned for that home-wrecking hunk of metal's accidental demise. When he finally came to pick me up in our boring van we spoke of picking up the bike the next day. It was still winter and late at night... too cold to ride he mutters. Well our girls freak out as soon as they hear, arguing who was going to ride with Daddy first. The next thing I hear is, "Daddy, can't we go get it tonight?" I do a double take as I hear him reply, "Well, I guess so, if your mother doesn't mind". Its 3 against 1 ... out numbered again. How can I say no and be the bad guy?
So we drive the 70 miles to go pick it up and once I see it, I have to say that its a pretty bike. Saddle bags, sissy bar, back rest for him, pretty nice and a steal compared to what he paid for it. So I start to follow him home and its overwhelming the excitement and pure happiness you can feel emanating off of him. He looks awesome on it I have to admit. We stop three times so he can hop in the van to fight off the hypothermia and pluck the icicles off his mustache. Yep he's still grinning.
That was about a month and 1/2 ago. Since then I've ridden on the back and actually enjoyed myself. Its like a mini vacation away from everything. Its peaceful and exhilarating at the same time. I've had to get use to him not being where I left him and I did get a little jealous of his bike, the mistress. I am also coming to terms that our lives are changing whether it be for good or bad and that there's no sense in worrying. I think he's earned the trust. I mean he handled himself and came back whole from a hostile country so I guess he can handle himself on a bike. I know I have a long way to go but I'm coming around. All that biker lore I heard so much about does happen, but its not the norm. I'm just letting myself go with it, wherever the road takes us.
So stay tuned for my initiation into the role of biker wife and the mysterious world of bikers, MC's and developing an iron ass (those passenger seats are abusive to my delicate rear end) I'll share what I learn and hopefully learn something from those that dare to follow me into what is sure to be a comedy of errors!
May the wind always blow through your hair and your bike upright,
Ash
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